Embeth Davidtz changed her name to a German name, Helen Hirsch. Helen Hirsch, a name in which she sought protection and life.

Left in the hands of a cruel man with the name of Amon Goeth. She was caught in a love that she could not reciprocate.

 

“My first day here, he beat me because I threw out the bones from dinner. He came down at midnight and asked for them.

And I asked him, I don’t know how, I could never ask him now, I said, “Why are you beating me?”

He said, “The reason I beat you now is because you ask why I beat you.”

 

“The more you see of the Herr Kommandant, the more you see there are no set rules you can live by, you cannot say to yourself, “If I follow these rules, I will be safe.”

 

 

He chose me out of the line of beautiful girls. I did not even have experience, while all the others did. Why me?

He looked me in the eyes which sent a shiver down my spine.

How will I survive?

 

I wore the same clothes – every single day.

I had the same ration of food – every single day.

I used my small bathroom – every single day.

I was to remain in a open cellar – every single day.

I had to clean the same objects – every single day.

I was his slave – every single day.

 

I heard footsteps.

Oskar Schindler was standing at the doorway.

He asked me how I was.

He encouraged me to keep going.

He told me I would not be killed.

He said to smile because I was Amon’s enjoyment.

But what I felt was utter disgust.

 

I heard footsteps.

Amon Goeth was standing at the doorway.

He looked me up and down.

All I could do was stare at the ground.

He came so close to me.

I could feel his breath against my neck.

He asked me if i was alone?

He answered all his questions himself.

He told me to speak, but I was too scared.

He almost kissed me.

Almost.

But instead he came to his senses and beat me.

I hated him with all my heart.