The inspiration for the following came from one word in particular that was discussed in class: “Introspection.” I consider myself a growth-oriented individual, and this is an ode to one of the contributing factors of that mindset. It references both the Seven Deadly Sins, and the Seven Heavenly Virtues to develop a dichotomy between who I was, and who I work towards becoming. Each Sin is only touched on briefly, because it was difficult to expand on how it was exemplified in my previous character while maintaining impartiality- I would almost subconsciously give justification for my actions.
I don’t think either of us have ever said “I love you”.
However we’ve said its counterpart plenty.
Wrath. “I hate you” rolled off the tongue so easily among all those expletives. I was too young, and you were too kindhearted. Our only teachers were the generation above us: two brothers, between them a feud that had lasted four of our lifetimes. We didn’t know any better.
Sloth. Both of us were lazy, and chose the convenience of getting upset over trying to understand one another. Always assuming the worst in you, I developed a predisposition to spite.
Envy. You were older, better behaved, always the kindest, and loved by everyone. Being better than you in all those ways was an insurmountable task, so, instead my efforts went into undermining you.
Gluttony. Depriving you for my own insatiable interests. There were things I wanted from you, not for myself, but just so that you wouldn’t have them.
Lust. My most sinful indulgence was wallowing in your discomfort. But you could always find something to be happy about, and that perpetually upset me.
Pride. “Apologizing made you weak.” I’d always wait for you to apologize first. Even when I was the only one in the wrong.
Greed. Sharing was a one way street for me. What’s yours was mine, and what was mine was mine alone. You were too generous, and I was too selfish. I took advantage of that.
No matter how deep I let myself sink into my vices, you always remained the same. Happy, virtuous, and compassionate. You might have sometimes been the first to get angry, but you were always the first to show concern.
I’m not proud of who I used to be, and I can’t let you be proud of me while remnants of that remain. This is a testimony of changes in progress..
Patience. Approach things with a level-head. Consider both sides to every story. You would never do something will ill intent. I know better.
Diligence. Not only working to solve problems, but putting effort into preventing them from arising. Doing my best to understand you, and always looking forward to the big things you’ll do.
Kindness. You don’t have to water the seeds of your future alone. Investing my own time and effort into your growth, rather than hindering it.
Abstinence. Putting my own interests and indulgences aside for your well-being.
Chastity. To be honest with my feelings, and bask in the light of your successes. I’ve always wanted to be happy beside you.
Humility. There is an opportunity for growth in every apology. Growth is what makes us stronger- not arbitrarily set competitions of ego.
Charity. Give without expecting anything in return. You’ve done enough for me already.
As your younger brother, I’ve taken it upon myself to become someone you can be proud of, and I’m happy to say I’m almost there. I must thank you again, for your patience.
I don’t think I say this enough, but I love you.